Is it my time yet?

A 54 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital.

While on the operating table she had a near death experience.. Seeing God she asked "Is my time up?"

God said, "No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live."

Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and  have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck.

She even had someone come in and change her hair color and brighten her teeth!  Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it.

After her last operation, she was released from the hospital.  While crossing the street on her way home,
she was killed by an ambulance.

Arriving in front of God, she demanded, "I thought you said I had another 43 years? Why didn't you pull me
from out of the path of the ambulance?"

(You'll love this)



God replied: "I didn't recognize you."

Who's sorry now

This man thought he had the best tattoo in the world ... till he went to prison.

sorted beth, that'll teach me to C&P instead of saving.

Just testing

Gotta love us seniors

During a visit to my doctor, I asked him, "How do you determine whether
or not an older person should be put in an old age home?"
"Well," he said, "we fill up a bathtub, then we offer a teaspoon, a teacup
and a bucket to the person to empty the bathtub."
"Oh, I understand," I said. "A normal person would use the bucket because
it is bigger than the spoon or the teacup."
"No" he said. "A normal person would pull the plug. Do you want a bed
near the window?"

ARE YOU GOING TO PASS THIS ON .
OR DO YOU WANT THE BED NEXT TO MINE? :